Fact: when my father died, I did not contact the exBFF - she read about it the newspaper and called me the day after his funeral.
I told her how The Nameless One had arranged for her boyfriend to desecrate my father's funeral book with a disgusting message forged to represent my deceased mother's brothers (all of who were deceased themselves except for the last one, who at that moment in time was in Florida). The exBFF then proceeded to actually defend that and proceeded to trash my father to me on the phone - the day after his funeral. This was in January 2011.
November 2011, on a Friday night the exBFF calls me on the phone at 11pm leaving a message on my answering machine demanding to know why I took her off my facebook.
She proceeded to call my house 5 more times during the night. I was awake and after the 6th call, I picked up the phone and told her I was contacting the phone company the following Monday.
I was told in January 2012 in a meeting with my manager, that the exBFF had called my place of employment the following day (Sunday) and wheedled out of whoever answered - the name of my manager and called my manager on that Monday. She told M. that I was printing out her medical records. My employer checked - they know every keystroke I did and they found NOTHING. Because I had done NOTHING.
During the meeting I was told - my employer waited until January to tell me of the accusation because they 'didn't want to ruin my holidays."
I told M. 'why the hell would I be printing out her medical records. I have known her since 1978. I know everything about her. I know why she comes here, what clinic she attends because she told me and I know all about her."
M. then told me that their computer techs had checked my computer access at KH and found me innocent and furthermore, the way I answered her questions - without violating HIPPA - showed I was innocent.
The screenshot I took of her message to my niece in the spring of 2012 showed she admitted to breaking the law by contacting my employer with lies after I threatened to report her to the phone company.
I then proceeded to write her a letter of intervention for her to stop her destructive behavior and to seek counseling. I did what the bestest of friends could ever do. What did I get in return? She took me to court, charging me with harassment - and even before the judge came into the courtroom, she was being disruptive, shouting, using foul language. John and I were sitting quietly while she mouthed off to a bailiff and was ordered to leave. As she passed me, she said in a low voice that she was going to beat my ass. I immediately raised my hand to summon the bailiff. "Excuse me, she just threatened me." She proceeded to RUN out of the court room while the bailiffs chased her.
Later - an order of protection was handed down -- against ME - to stay away from her for a year. I had done nothing wrong - it was she who broke the law - but well whatever - the order of protection did what I had been trying to do for 7 years - get her OUT of my life.
In 2022, ten years later, she contacted me on instagram - wanting to be friends. She missed me and John. She sent me her phone number.
I called her and left a message - that I wanted nothing to do with her ever again.
A near 30 year friendship destroyed, I used my personal time and sick time from work to ensure HER safety and what did I get in return? Got shit on big time.
So yeah - I have healed -- but as the meme says - something will turn up out of the blue and bring back the memories and the anger.
But I have learned something - I will always help - that's how I am - I'm a helper. I will help someone who has a problem. I will help them by providing the resources they need to solve the problem. It will be up to them to avail themselves of those resources.
If they refuse to help themselves - I will cut them loose.
I went through HELL because of the Nameless One and the exBFF.
NEVER AGAIN.
I am retired now. I took away their favorite toy - calling my job to get me fired. I have peace and serenity now. I will allow NO ONE to interfere with my life and my serenity again
