Song of the Day - August 13, 2024 - have some fun!

 

Those who violate my boundaries should not be surprised by my actions. I won't put up with anybody's crap.

 

Truth. I had boundaries in place. Both Joan/Doris and the FJM, the exBFF, violated those boundaries. 

But why was there the need for me to put boundaries in place? Common decency and respect for me shouldn't mean that I had to put boundaries in place. 

Joan/Doris lied to me continuously. Stole money from me. Refused to repay me. When I showed my legitimate reason to be angry over the situation, she blew up, went ballistic and began her campaign of hate and retribution towards me. 

The situation with the exBFF was a bit different, but she treated me like I was nothing. Just a piece of meat to be used and taken advantage of. Worthy of gross disrespect. Continuously using me, lying to me, then resorting to stealing pain pills from a bottle in my bathroom. I was already tired and worn out from battling Joan/Doris. I didn't want to go through it from another person, so I tried distancing myself from FJM. 

What was her response? Long rambling nonsense messages on facebook (fueled by drugs). A crazed phone call from her the day after my father's funeral, wherein she TRASHED my father. Both she and I had tenuous relationships with our fathers. I understood her feelings towards her father. And when he passed away in December 2002, I attended his funeral. I showed great respect towards the entire family. FJM was distraught over her father's passing, despite her rocky relationship with him. 

And the same for myself. I had an on-again, off-again estranged relationship with my father. But I also loved him. When we received the call that he passed away in the hospital, my husband and I went to the hospital to join my family in his room to say our farewells. He had already made his plans, and everything was set. My husband served as one of his pallbearers. 

Arrangements were made that Joan/Doris was to NOT be attendance at the funeral home while the family was there. She was told that she could come to see him after we left. This was due to her continuous gross disrespect to all of us. She did come, and brought her current boyfriend, who under her instructions, wrote a disgusting message of hate in my father's funeral guest book. - an eyewitness, and old friend of mine and my one sister from when we were teenagers - witnessed it and called us to alert us to it. We took care of the situation before our stepmother saw it. 

I had not called FJM to tell her that my father had died. She read about it in the newspaper the next day and called me. I told her what Joan/Doris and her boyfriend had done. FJM said that my father should never have given FJM up for adoption. Excuse me, but this was not the time to debate my father's past actions. And did that justify the desecration of his funeral book? I grew angry and told her it didn't matter if she was adopted or not, she had no right to get someone to do that. FJM began arguing with me. I hung up on her. 

So was I supposed to put a boundary beforehand?

um, so listen up -- when my father passes away, you will not call me up and debate his past actions with me. 

NO -- decent human beings understand that when a person is grieving, you do not find fault with or criticize the person they are grieving. I could have found fault with FJM's father. I could have brought those up to her while she was grieving. But I didn't. Because you just don't do that. -- But she did. And got the phone slammed down on her. 

She chose to get 'offended' and ramped up her dumbass comments on facebook. I unfriended her. Then she got ‘offended’ again, and calls me up one night demanding to know why I took her off my facebook page. I was like, what - are we in 6th grade? I didn’t want to talk to her, so I changed the greeting on my answering machine that told her to stop bothering me, stop calling me, that if she kept calling me I would report her to the phone company. 

She called again and listened to that message and apparently when another boundary was put in place (stop calling my house) she went ballistic. The next day, Sunday, she called my job, finagled someone to find out my immediate supervisor's name, and the next day, Monday, she called my manager and told her that I was printing out her medical records. 

This was a serious accusation. In violation of federal HPPA patient privacy laws. 

My employer investigated me. Guess what? They found me innocent. Firstly, because my computer signon info gave me limited access to patients. I could only access the charts of the patients that I was assigned to on my current workday. If a patient was assigned to me on one day, but not the next, that next day -- I couldn't access their chart. AND I was given access only to a certain part of their chart - I could not access their medical history. Since FJM was NEVER assigned to me - I had ZERO access to her chart. 

Furthermore, my employer could track EVERY KEYSTROKE I performed on the computer on my job. 

Why did FJM call my job with this accusation? Because she thought I would get fired. 

See, the same thing happened to her some years before. She was working at a different hospital and signed out xrays for her sister in law. When the sister in law realized what had happened, she made a complaint to the hospital. FJM got called down to HR. And instead of saying 'well, I signed out her xrays last year, because she asked me, so I did it again, cos she needed them for an upcoming doctor appointment, so I didn't know there would be a problem." she created a problem.

The HPPA laws were new - just put in place a couple of months before she signed out the xrays the second time. In my opinion, the sister in law shouldn't have made the complaint, but it was her decision and her right to do so. 

So, instead of FJM telling her employer she made a mistake - and probably would have just drawn a reprimand -- she went ballistic in the office. (She called me up and proudly told what she did). 

They threatened her with disciplinary action - job loss. Her attitude didn't help. She had stood up so fast and hard, the chair went flying - she was screaming that she would kick her sister in law's ass. She was told then, that she was indeed fired. Well, duh, when threatened with disciplinary action, the correct course would be to say ,’sorry, it won’t happen again.’ But nope, she chose another route.

She stormed out of the office. She went to her work station and grabbed her purse and personal belongings and left before hospital security got to her work station. 

Meanwhile, hospital officials were alarmed at her threat, and called Buffalo Police and the sister in law that a threat had been made. 

So instead of feeling remorse at what she did - or at least confusion over the newly instated patient privacy laws, she went ballistic and called me up and trashed her sister in law - who had 'caused her to lose her job.' - uh, no, T. didn't cause FJM to lose her job. All FJM had to do was say "well, I didn't realize that I couldn't do that. But since you say I shouldn't, it won't happen again." The person who caused FJM to lose her job was FJM herself. 

So fast forward to the time she called MY job to report me for violating patient privacy laws. As I explained above, my employer investigated me and found me innocent. I did not lose my job. But what is troubling is that seeing how violating the HPPA laws caused her to lose her job, that's what she wanted for me. WHY? Because I took her off my facebook page? 

I was friggin paying a mortgage. When this happened, in 2012, I had been at my job for 40 years - and racking up a good pension. Which when I retired in 2015, I began receiving. I am currently getting a very good monthly pension payment, along with my very good Social Security. By trying to get me fired in 2012, she jeopardized my pension, my home, and my future. 

Not that I was ever worried about that - why? BECAUSE I NEVER COMMITTED ANY COMPUTER FRAUD ON MY JOB - despite what FJM and Joan/Doris like to spread around and then call my job with lies to get me fired. 

Who the hell does that to other people? Vindictive, jealous little evil bitches - that's who. They look over at my life - a secure marriage with a good man. A homeowner, someone who had respect at her job - and they look at their own miserable failed lives - and instead of lifting themselves up out their misery - they choose to break unmade boundaries of decency and respect - and try to destroy me and my life. 

But, they failed. And the mere fact that they tried - makes me see them for what and who they are and always were - pretenders, manipulators, liars, thieves, disgusting pieces of crap - not worthy of being in my life and around me. 

In 2022, the exBFF contacted me on instagram, wanting to be friends with me. I sent her packing. Why the hell would I want that disgusting person in my life again? 

I have peace and serenity in my life. I surround myself with good people. I spend my days gardening, improving my home, (mortgage is paid off completely). I like reading books, writing fan fiction, fooling around on facebook, I do fun things. I like to play computer games. I spend time with my cat. He likes chasing bubbles, and my husband and I both like to blow the soap bubble on the porch with him.

I go out on outings. Just the other day, my cousin and her husband, and I went to LilyDale, NY to see a fan presentation by actress Melody Thomas Scott of the soap opera "The Young and the Restless." 

And in a couple of days, that cousin, her husband, and another cousin, and a couple of other friends of ours, will be having our annual daytrip to LilyDale, NY. 

And me and some of my cousins have started our own paranormal investigation group. Yes, I am a 'ghost hunter.' 

My life is good. My husband and I just celebrated our 22nd wedding anniversary. I have a full, rich life, with several hobbies. I do not choose to have hateful and hate-filled people in my life. That is my boundary - violate it - try to violate it - and you can go straight to hell for all I care.

 

Ever wake up with a song in your head? I just woke up to a great song (link in post)

Good morning.

It’s 5:35 am. I got up a little while ago with this great song running in my head.
From 1976 - enjoy:
Bay City Rollers - ‘I Only Want to be With You’
by the way, I met my husband John in 1978. We were good friends and then in 1986, our friendship turned romantic. We moved in together in 1987, got married in 2002 and are still going strong. And yeah, I only wanna be with him.

John and I cutting our cake at our wedding barbecue

 

Nothing ever stops Godzilla

 

The Nameless One finds out we have African DNA in us, and she's off and running about she 'doesn't know how to be black.'

 

OK. I swore I wouldn't write anymore about The Nameless One, but.... I discovered another freaking bizarre piece of nonsense.

So I'm awake at 2am, June 25, had a little snack and winding down to go back to bed and googling stuff and something told me to google The Nameless One. And a blog post of hers from a year ago shows up. "Small bits of African DNA in my white-European genome." 

Well, this intrigued me so I had to go do a look-see. 

Okay, the post itself is a rundown of our genetic background and her reaction to it. Siblings share the same genetic background. I never had my DNA tested, but since The Nameless One had it done, and then one of my older sisters had it done (which both are identical), so why should I spend the money? 

I've known for awhile now that I'm a basic American Mutt - I got all sorts of ethnicities in me. Mostly German. But I don't identify as German. I identify as "American Mixed Mongrel" -- but actually - I identify myself as ..... ME. 

I just happen to be married to a black man. Whose ethnic background is (obviously) Black, and also Cherokee, and Latino.This does not make ME black, Cherokee, or Latino. 

The exBFF once remarked to me: "You're like me - black-oriented." -- huh? 

Um, I'm married to a black dude, I like the old time Motown Sound, I took a American Black History course in my senior year in high school -- doesn't make me black. 

My first husband was from Yemen. I've loved Arabian mythology since I was a kid, loved watching belly dancers so much, I decided to be one myself. I've read the Koran, learned a smattering of the Arabic language - none of that makes me Arab.

Whatever interests I have in my life doesn’t make me them. I like science fiction. Especially Star Trek and the Vulcan Mr. Spock. Doesn’t make me Vulcan. 

I like cats. I’ve had several cats as pets. Doesn’t make me feline. 

I like the music of the late Greek electronic musician Vangelis. I like souvlaki - doesn’t make me Greek.

So having a black husband does not make ME black or black-oriented. 

So let’s get back to The Nameless One. What does The Nameless One have to say about her finding out about having a smidgen of African DNA in her? 

She whines that she's been white all her life and DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO BE BLACK.

Okay, so now I find out that not only am I married to a black man, I’m part black myself. Hmmm. Interesting. Intriguing. -- But only to the point that it is a testament as to how human beings have migrated and mixed together for all these thousand of years. And in the wonderment of who my ancestors were, where they came from, that their DNA is a part of me. However - I am still ME. I am in charge of my life and live it the way I see fit. And I don’t live it to be black or white because of who I am married to.

Both The Nameless One and the exBFF sure have some crazy ideas about life. 

https://forbiddenfamily.com/2023/05/25/small-bits-of-african-dna-in-my-white-european-genome/

 

Jon Anderson (formerly of Yes) in concert with The Band Geeks ----------- I attended his concert yesterday (June 8, 2024)

Jon Anderson and The Band Geeks

I have been a fan of the prog rock group Yes since 1972, and have had a crush on lead singer Jon Anderson from that time.

I’ve been fortunate to see Yes a few times in concert and Jon as well since he left Yes. Sometimes solo, sometimes with former members of Yes. 

Yesterday afternoon, my cousin Cindy and her husband Paul treated me to see Jon and his friends The Band Geeks in Hammondsport NY.

Jon was amazing as usual. His energy is unstoppable, his voice is as clear and angelic as always.

I just adore this man.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iMXTGzhBBM

I was nice to Joan/Doris until she and her deadbeat husband stole from me. When I demanded repayment, I was now a 'bitch'

Having 700 bucks swindled outta ya just make ya turn into a bitch.

Finding out that some of it went to the deadbeat husbands addiction to a stripper joint made me a bigger bitch.

Having come to my house with 10 lousy bucks in hand and whining, 'can't you just take this 10? I don't want to go home and hear J. yell." This after they agreed to pay me back 50 bucks a month. That 10 bucks and a previous payment of $50 was all I saw of my $700 to this day.

But, yeah, I'M the bitch.

#NamelessOne #AdopteesWhoThinkTheyCanTreatOthersLikeAssholes
ps: 'Nameless One' - my pet name for Joan Wheeler/Doris Michol Sippel
and yes, she and her husband swindled $700.00 from me. Promised to pay me back, reneged on their promise, when I needed the money, they turned their backs on me, I got mad and told her to keep the fucking money, but she would NOT be in my life - I was no longer her 'sister' and wanted nothing more to do with her.

And because I had the nerve to set up a boundary (disrespect me by stealing from me, lying to me, breaking a promise to repay me, causing me to not trust her and forbid her to have contact with me) - she started her 25 years campaign of hate and retribution towards me.

But see, she had made her choice - she could have chosen to retain a loving relationship with me - she chose to destroy that. 

I had a choice too. To keep a lying disrespectful thief in my life? Or boot her out of my life? I chose the latter. And am happy for doing so.