Once a snake, always a snake - Joan/Doris and Fran: snakes.

 

In 2012, Francine called my job to get me fired. She claimed I was violating HPPA by looking up her medical records.

1. My sign on information - my password - got me only to a certain portion of the hospital computer system - only that portion that allowed me to chart patient’s vital signs, outputs, their ADLs (activities of daily living) and the tasks that I performed (doing my job).
I had access to ONLY the patients that I was assigned to. The charge nurse, who made out my assignment had to go in, select those patients, and assign my name to them.
Sometimes I would see on the grease board my assignment (Rooms 1 to 10, for example). I would see Mr. So and So is in room 2. I took him to the bathroom. I go to check off that I took him to the bathroom, but the charge nurse hadn’t assigned my name to him yet, so I COULD NOT ACCESS HIS CHART TO PUT IN THE INFORMATION.
As soon as she assigned my name in the computer to that patient, then and only then, could I access his chart to do my documentation.
Also the patient’s chart that I could access ONLY had the areas that the hospital deemed that I, as a nurse aide/PCA, needed to do my job. Other people had access to more of the patient chart, as per what their job function was.
If Francine was NOT on my assigned patient list (and she never was), THERE WAS NO WAY I COULD ACCESS HER MEDICAL RECORDS.

2. My employer’s  COMPUTER SECURITY TEAM TRACKED EVERY KEYSTROKE I PERFORMED.

3. When she called the hospital - they investigated and found me innocent - because of all of the above.

4. Francine herself worked at another hospital for a couple of years. She knows these things - she herself got fired because she violated HPPA - she knows how hospitals work, and how their computer security systems work. So her calling my employer was an out and out LIE - and trying to get me fired, so I could lose my source of income.

Joan Wheeler/Doris Sippel also would call my job with lies to get me fired. And again, I was investigated, and found innocent - again for the same reasons above. 

Both Joan/Doris and Francine are snakes. They have both been out of my life for 10 years now - and they will remain OUT of my life. Because I do not trust them. I know them too well.

Francine contacted me on Instagram a few months ago, wanting back into my life.
OH HELL NO.

Joan/Doris is old news, irrelevant, boring.

 a post I made on facebook earlier this evening.

 my facebook intro:

A few years ago, my sister Gert made a facebook page called "Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman's Struggle For Identity; a book study" -- it was to replace our old Wordpress blogs. The other day, Gert made the decision to delete the page, as we no longer have a use for it. I wrote the following post a little while ago.

Despite my finding the other day that about 6 months ago Joan/Doris got called out on facebook for busting up a marriage, the time has come to put her where she belongs: away from us.

The Notice:

Notice from Ruth Sippel Pace

this page is in the process of being deleted.

Joan Mary Wheeler aka Doris Michol Sippel is irrelevant.

When her book was published in 2009, we had blogs to refute every damn lie that was in her wretched book. Those blogs were taken down by a series of trumped up complaints by Joan and one of her cronies. Doesn't matter - because we accomplished what we set out to do: get that book pulled from publication.

In the book, Joan/Doris twisted several stories regarding me and her - specifically in our court proceedings about harassment. In the book she says this and that -- I submitted the actual court documents to the publisher of her book. They reviewed everything and pulled the book from publication. 

When Joan/Doris signed a contract with them, she stated her book was non-fiction and everything in it was true and factual. When I presented the proof that she lied about me in the book - the publisher's legal team ruled that she violated her contract. 

Years ago, Joan/Doris had 3 fantasies. 

1. that her book would be a million dollar best-seller

2. her book would be made into a blockbuster Hollywood movie

3. because of those two 'successes', she would be in demand as a top speaker at adoption conferences all over the world.

When her book was pulled from publication, all three of her fantasies came crashing down on her. 

Joan/Doris and others like her describe themselves as 'angry adoptees' - those that are so pissed that they were adopted they can't see reason - in regards to anything. When I had my main blog up and running, and I would relate an action of harassment by Joan/Doris against me (like stealing money from me) - her 'angry adoptee' friends would come running and leave obscene comments on my page, and accuse me of not respecting Joan/Doris. 

I countered - if a person steals from me, and I outed them, you would say "You go girl. Don't let them walk all over you." But if that person happens to be an adoptee, you think I'm wrong for NOT letting them walk all over me. This is what I mean that these angry adoptees can not and will not see reason. They were adopted. They were wronged. Therefore the world owes them everything. The world should not be angry at them when they misbehave. They think that anyone who disagrees with them should be treated like dirt. BULLSHIT. 

So all this happened more than 10 years ago. What has changed? The adoptees that DO see reason, that DO object to people treating others like dirt, have distanced themselves from Joan/Doris. 

She struggles to get any books published. I don't know what else she does as I don't care about her. She has been neutralized. She has actually finally done what I started to accomplish back in October 2009, in answering a comment she put out on a national news website about adoption. --That she refrains from putting out information about us, her birth sisters. 

I had repeatedly said all over the internet - all Joan/Doris has to say is, "I was given up for adoption when my mother died and my father had child care issues. When I turned 18, I was found by my older siblings. We had a nice reunion, but then things turned sour. I do not associate with my birth sisters. " And for the past few years, that is essentially what she has been doing - maybe not in those same words. 

I myself do have a blog via Google's Blogger, that I had intended to replace my main blog from Wordpress. I was thinking about copying and pasting old blogposts here and there, but frankly, since I've retired, I got better things to do. And so does Gert, who had started this page also as a replacement for her old Wordpress blog. 

I will continue to keep my Google Blooger blog, in case Joan/Doris starts her shit again. But really, there's nothing she can do to me now. In the past, she liked to call my job with lies - trying to get me fired. Ha.! I'm retired now, I took away her favorite toy. 

Joan/Doris is old news, irrelevant, boring. And as I said above, we did what we set out to do: get that book that was full of lies about me pulled from publication. She did make two more editions of it, changing things around - making two more versions of 'the truth' - and how can there be more versions of a truth? I'm not talking about personal perceptions, but actual FACTS. She can't say she had an order of protection against me for the duration of one year, when the actual court document reads SIX MONTHS.

Facts are facts. Lies are Lies. She got caught in her lies, and the publisher saw the lies, and saw the factual court document and pulled the book. 

So, she self-published it and hawks it on amazon. She's not making any millions from it. Not many people are buying it. And those that do - if they can't see beyond the crap she wrote about me - her own admission to being a child abuser and an alcoholic, and a bar-hopping tramp - well if they like that kind of story-telling, they are as bad as she is. 

And with that, Gert and I bid you all a fond farewell.

We have peace and joy in our lives. I doubt that Joan/Doris does. We don't really care. And we hope anyone reading this has peace and joy in your lives as well.

Live Long and Prosper.

ps    oh, by the way, in deleting stuff from the facebook page, I came across this post that I made in 2015.

It is interesting that the other day, a troll came here and tried to shut us up. But on her own facebook page she put up a meme and left this comment: "Never let people bully you into not telling your story."
But that was exactly what that troll was trying to do to us - BULLY us into silence. And while the troll was busy admonishing us and telling us to behave, the troll stooped to calling us names. (how childish).

I did engage in a conversation with the troll - but will not do so in the future. All trolls will be dealt with swiftly. If you want to engage in an adult conversation, fine, but bullying and name-calling will not be tolerated.

Getting back to the present: in regards to bullying trolls -- this is exactly why comments have been turned off on this blog that you are reading now.

I don't have to take anyone's shit. 

I no longer allow people to cause chaos in my life.

 

Read this well Francine and Doris/Joan - you have both been out of my life since 2012.
I refuse to let either one of you drama queens and your fucked up chaotic selves into my serene life.

I don’t care how much whining you do Francine, ("life is short, I hope to see you before I leave this world") - you should have thought of that before you kicked me in the teeth. And you come whining in March 2022 that you want to be in my life.
Fuck off.

I do not want certain people around me.

 

THIS.
This is why I tried to distance myself from both Doris/Joan and the exBFF.
And the narcissists that they are weren’t having it.
Both decided to ‘punish’ me.
Both had always used me as a doormat - and when I pulled that doormat out, they weren’t going to have it.

It took a few years and some serious blows, but I finally got the exBFF out of my life. That was 10 years ago. I have been very happy the past 10 years. Even Doris/Joan has finally stopped her crap.

I don’t know if she ever stopped her stupid calling my job trying to get me fired. The last time I was called down to Human Resources they told me they had investigated me for the ‘computer fraud’ that Doris/Joan told them I was doing - and they found me innocent. (they can track every key-stroke I did).

At that meeting, I told them, “you know I’m innocent. I’ve been working here for many years, you know what kind of worker I am. You know my reputation. You know that Joan Wheeler aka Doris Michol Sippel has been harassing and stalking me for years - and calling you since 1995 with stupid false accusations - you have investigated those false claims and have found me innocent. Frankly, I don’t want to hear it anymore. She calls again, YOU call your legal team and handle her. I’ve had her in court several times, but they won’t do a damn thing because she’s related to me. I just want to be left alone to do my job.”

And when the exBFF tried that nonsense as well to ‘punish’ me for removing her from my facebook (how childish) - and I was called down to HR again, (after having been investigated and found innocent), I told them the same thing. I told them if they get any more bullshit calls and they investigate me, and find me innocent, I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ANYTHING ABOUT IT. I told them to get their legal team on it.

Were any more calls made by either the exBFF or Joan/Doris? I don’t know. If they did call, I wasn’t told.

That was all back in 2012 and 2013. I retired in 2015. My husband had retired a few years before me. We are now enjoying our retirement.

The meme says "My whole mindset has changed. I don't have the energy to do certain things or be around certain people anymore. I'm at the point in my life now where if something feels like it's draining my energy or fighting with my peace of mind, I'm not dealing with it, at all. I'll walk away from that shit in a heartbeat."

The only reason I’m spending energy relating these things here on my blog, is to get these things off my chest. And I know these two abusers (Joan/Doris, the exBFF) are such whiny losers, narcissists and abusers, they won’t accept that I DON’T WANT THEM AROUND ME.

Proof: Just a few months ago, March 2022, the exBFF contacted me on Instagram, wanting to be my friend again. (see recent older posts on this blog). Her message to me included her phone number which I called and left a voicemail telling her in no uncertain terms that I want nothing to do with her EVER!

The last line of the meme: “I'll walk away from that shit in a heartbeat.”

STAY AWAY FROM ME FRANCINE - YOU ARE DEAD TO ME. GOODBYE AND GOOD RIDDANCE.

On the subject of “amateur psychoanalysis”

 

A facebook acquaintance wrote the following:

"Several decades ago, I learned very quickly that amateur psychoanalysis was one of the single-stupidest ways to interact with anyone.

Nobody likes it. I don't. I don't know anybody who does. It's a violation of personal space. And it's about as useful as a burlap condom. It doesn't work. It doesn't produce any useful result -- only annoyance, anger, and confusion.

First of all, most people are simply NOT QUALIFIED to engage in that kind of psychobabble bullshit. You learn a few terms, it still doesn't make you a master in the field."

I was reminded of an unsettling experience I had with the exBFF back in 2005. 

'amateur psychoanalysis' - I think we've all done it to some degree to try to explain other people's behavior. I think a lot of us have done that the past few years - trying to understand why the Mango Manbaby is the way he is (narcissism), and to try to understand society's woes (racism, violence, etc). 

But when it comes to being an 'armchair psychoanalyst' to others and then vocalizing your 'results' to their face - that's a definite no-no. It's even worse when you do it to someone you know, and worse still, when you do it to a friend. 

Back in 2005 I was finally able to get the exBFF into detox (at her request, then her balking against it). She began going to counseling. I told her she was doing the right thing. She requested some 'space' so she could digest what she was learning. I understood and gave her that space. 

She called me up a few weeks later to tell me of her progress. She starts telling me what she learned about addiction - then proceeded to tell me that I too was suffering from addiction. Actually, she said that everyone suffers from some sort of addiction - smoking, overeating, etc. Then she told me my love of sweets was my addiction.

I immediately starting feeling uneasy. The next few minutes, she proceeded to psychoanalyze me, and my love of Reese Cups. My uneasiness grew to anger. I felt insulted.

I'm a grown woman. At that time (2005), I was still gainfully employed. (I was employed continuously from 1971 to 2015 - when I retired with a damn good pension). In 2005, I was making mortgage payments (mortgage paid off entirely in 2022) and the upkeep of the house (with my husband). I had gained weight, yes - but it was due to the onset of menopause, not because I stuffed myself with Reese Cups everyday. 

There were times in my adult life, I recognized the need for myself to seek counseling, which I did. I have also read many 'self-help' books, and even a couple of psychology books. I had an unsettled childhood, I know some of that has manifested into what 'makes me tick' as an adult. 

What I didn't need back in 2005, nor do I need now - is someone who is going to counseling, taking what they learn in the afternoons, going home in the evenings, and instead of applying it to themselves, apply it to other people - or ME.

If I want to know why I like to eat a Reese Cup, I am quite capable of doing it on my own. 

ps. My 'addiction' to Reese Cups (or KlonDike bars) has never spurred me onto to stealing from my friends, or engaging in anti-social behavior.
And any psycho-analyzing I've done on Joan/Doris is justified because of the way she slandered me in her book, her blog, and various places on the internet. If she didn't want me to 'armchair psychoanalyze' her, she should have left me alone.

This is part of why I have this blog. To get MY truth out. Anybody reading this can take it as they want. If they don’t like what they see, that’s fine. However, I won’t be subjected to any abuse for putting out the truth of MY life.
Some coward had left a comment on this blog some time ago - and called me a liar, when I wrote a post about my husband.
Like I’m going to lie about my husband here, and on facebook. Among my friends on facebook are my husband’s brother, other family members, members of his brother’s in laws, a couple of my husband’s friends -- um, no, with all those people who know my husband reading my facebook - you think I’m going to lie about him?
I removed the ability for readers to comment - because I will not tolerate any coward to come and verbally abuse me. I do not allow ANYONE to abuse me.

The other reason I have this blog is that I know a certain couple of people are snoops and even though they have blocked me from their social media, still want to know my business. I don’t care. My facebook, twitter, instagram, pinterest are not private - nor is this blog - read it, don’t read it. I don’t care. Agree with me, disagree with me - I don’t care. But what I do care is - as I said above - there is no ability to leave a comment - because I will not allow anyone to abuse me.

 

The one in the middle - about not apologizing - well, sometimes they do apologize - but in a way that you know they don't mean it.

To them, an apology is not about any kind of regret of what they did, but rather it is simply words carefully said in order to manipulate you into 'forgiving' them and enabling them to keep shitting on you. 

When the exBFF contacted me on instagram recently, she rendered one of those haphazard 'apologies; - saying she was sorry for 'not understanding me the way I thought she should have.' 

read that again. She basically turned her apology around to put it all on ME. That it was MY fault that she didn't understand me! What fucking nerve!

And no where was there an apology or acknowledgement of the shit she did to me 2010-2012. She assumed she could manipulate me into forgiving her and let her back into my life - she even left me her phone number! Which I called and left her a voicemail letting her know in no uncertain terms that I wanted nothing to do with her.